Tampa Man Who Killed a Flamingo Might Have Some Issues

Or-Fucking-Lando -  Flamingos stomp their feet to bring delicious critters to the water's surface. But when Pinky did it, people were entertained. She was one of Busch Garden's animal ambassadors, danced the flamenco on TV and delighted delegates at the 2012 Republican National Convention.

Pinky the flamingo died Tuesday, police said, after she was attacked by a park patron.

Tampa police said Joseph Corrao, 45, grabbed her pink-feathered body and violently slammed Pinky to the ground about 6:44 p.m. Tuesday — in front of his own mother and three children.

Corrao, of Orlando, was arrested on a charge of felony animal cruelty — a year and 15 days after his release from prison on charges that he shot and killed two chained dogs at point-blank range with a shotgun.

He lived in Lake City, according to the Columbia County Sheriff's Office, when in 2013 he executed his neighbor's dogs — he blamed them for killing his daughter's rabbits — and threatened a witness.

Then police said he grabbed Pinky. Tampa police it was unclear why Corrao grabbed the bird, or if alcohol was a factor. But a witness told WFTS-Ch. 28 that Corrao laughed afterward.

"It's beyond senseless," Conrad said, according to a video feed of the court hearing. "It actually borders on depraved in my opinion. . . . I don't know if have you other issues, but I don't know who does that."

Corrao has a long history of arrests in Florida, records show, starting at the age of 25 with drug charges. He has also faced charges of hit and run, child abuse, contributing to the delinquency of a child, driving under the influence, DUI with serious bodily injury and burglary.

How about this Conrad guy saying this "borders" on depravity?? Making a fake Facebook profile to fuck with your ex, pretending to have cancer to get sympathy from others...those things border on depravity. But picking up a famous flamingo by the neck and spiking it to its death while you laugh in full view of women and children? That's top level insanity right there. Add that to the laundry list of fuck-ups in this guy's past and its clear there is no method of execution to cruel for him. We gotta vaporize this guy. There is no hope for this person or his children while he is alive. Time to go, Joseph.

Look at this adorable thing...

Hottest Girl on TV Right Now

Khaleesi's vice-president, Missandei, is hands down the hottest girl on television right now. And I'm talking about the character, not the actual actress. Don't get me wrong, Nathalie Emmanual, is an absolute knock-out. But so is every other actress. There's just something about they way this character carries herself that makes me covet. Covet big time. The backless dresses, the innocent eyes, the crush she has on a eunuch, the naked river bathing....All I want to do is roll around with her in satin sheets and tell her everything. If she gets killed on this show I will never get over it.

Oh...and....

Hope Solo's Vagina Says, "Today Is The Day You Die".

There are lots of pleasing images to come out of the recent rush of celebrity nude leaks. Emily Rat's bombs, Vanessa Hudgens' trim, Gaby Union's rump all come to mind. But the series of pics featuring Hope Solo's vagina and asshole are about as disturbing as it gets. I felt threatened when I looked at those pics. She has a menacing pussy and that has to be the worst way to describe one. Clearly, whatever goes in there is never coming back out. The fact that she thought those were something someone would find sexy is crazy. And the possibility that someone actually did find them sexy is even worse. It's the rawest, dryest, brownest, reddest vagina in the world. And that, coupled with her dry, stretched out asshole is the stuff of nightmares. The pussy and/or asshole pic game is a tricky one but I have to imagine that rule number 1 is, spread your legs as warranted, but let everything else rest of its own accord. Relaxed twat shots only please. I think the link is down now so if you haven't seen them yet, consider yourself spared. If you want to see a series of pics closest resembling them... here you go...

Is This The Stupidest Actor in the History of Television?

Bustle.com Apparently, Skrein left Game of Thrones to star in a Transporter movie as a younger Jason Statham, which quite frankly, doesn’t have the critical adulation that Thrones does, but hey — action movies are action movies, and we aren’t privy to any information about contractual obligations he might have had prior to embarking on his brief journey in Westeros.

So the guy who played Daario Naharis in season 3 of Game of Thrones decided not to come back in season 4 so he could play young Jason Statham in what? A prequel to The Transporter?? Gods! I can only assume there's more to this story because what fucking nutcake gives up the opportunity to be a prominently featured character in what might go down as the most popular cable TV series of all time?? Not only that, but even though he's a relatively new character...this dude had buzz. As much as I wanted to hate him and resent the very existence of this kind of guy, I couldn't. His character was ladies' man incarnate. Girls were creaming themselves over this guy. I've never seen more sexual tension between two characters as there was with him and Khaleesi last year. I haven't read the books but I can only assume that these two fuck at some point. And if they don't it HBO still has to make it happen. Because Khaleesi wants it. Daario wants it. And goddamn it, the public wants it. The only person that doesn't want it is poor Ser Jorah. Well at least that was the case when this guy was playing Daario. The new guy they cast is such a departure from from the cocky, smoldering, chop-two-guys-heads-off-because-you're-pretty Daario that I don't even think Khaleesi likes him anymore. It's that tangible. I mean, shit, in her first scene she scolds Daario and Grey Worm for sitting there like goofy 10 year olds playing some feats of strength game. That's not the Daario I know. Not at all. I just can't fathom why someone would walk away from one of the most watched and talked about shows on TV, especially when he was probably only a few scenes away from having Emilia Clarke rub her adorable boobs all over him. Crazy stuff.

Dude, get out of my favorite show. Who do you possibly think you are? Yuck.

That Guy My Ass

So Showtime On Demand has a documentary called "That Guy...Who Was In That Thing". It's about a bunch of character actors who are undeniably recognizable but whenever you see them all you can say is, "Hey, it's that guy.." You don't know their name and you're lucky to remember one thing they were in at all. Anyway, I don't know how many people they approached for this documentary but their list leaves a lot to be desired. There are no hard and fast rules to what exactly makes someone a "that guy", but I'm gonna lay out some loose guidelines and then see how their choices measure up. The first thing you think of when you see a guy is a big indicator. If you think of his real name, he's probably isn't a that guy. If you think of a role he is forever linked to, again...no. If a bunch of shit runs through your head, now you're getting somewhere. But for the most part its a judgment call and it's on a case-by-case basis. Okay, here are the actors featured in the documentary:

Xander Berkeley

Immediately think: George Mason from "24". Followed by Air Force One and Nikita.
Also think: I can't believe I never realized he was the Navy guy in A Few Good Men who assigned the case to Caffey and Weinberg.
Is he a That Guy?: Yes. Even though I had seen the name Xander Berkeley all over the place on different show's credits. Not until Nikita, did I actually put it together that it was this guy. I no longer watch Nikita. Not cause of this guy, I just lost interest.

Bruce Davison

Immediately think: Hey, it's Bruce Davison. X-Men, Harry and the Hendersons TV Show, Administrator of Susan's estate on Seinfeld.
Also think: He's related to Ed Begley, Jr. and I have no idea why they're keeping it a secret.
Is he a That Guy?: I say no. It's Bruce Davison. I know who he is and I think lots of other people do too.

Mark Rolston

Immediately think: It's Boggs from Shawshank!
Also think: It's Boggs from Shawshank!
Is he a That Guy?: No. Even though this guy's been in a bunch of other things and no one's ever gonna remember the name Mark Rolston, you never say "that guy". You say Boggs. Gotta draw the line somewhere.

Rick Worthy

Immediately think: That's not Mike Cannon from Las Vegas but maybe it's the black guy who married Keira Knightley in Love Actually.
Also think: I have no fucking clue who this guy is but did you know that Rick from the Walking Dead was the guy who pined for Keira Knightley, his best friend's wife, in Love Actually?
Is he a That Guy?: I looked him up and he was in some Star Trek stuff...but cut the shit.

Stanley Kamel

Immediately think: Tony Marchette, Antonia's dad, from the original 90210.
Also think: He was Amanda Woodward's boss who I think hung himself in Melrose Place. All these same thoughts ran through my head when I saw him pop up on the In Memoriam list during the Oscars a few years ago.
Is he a That Guy?: Debatable, I guess. But not in my book.

Timothy Omundson

Immediately think: It's Brom the idiot, wannabe gold-digger from Deadwood Season 1.
Also think: Stop looking at me like that.
Is he a That Guy?: I say no. Sure he's been in other stuff. Like I remember him in Jericho, but when I see him my memory doesn't start racing to remember all the other shit he was in.

William Morgan Sheppard

Immediately think: Heyyyy, youuuu!!??? I honestly have never seen this guy in anything and I refuse to look up his IMDB to prove myself wrong.
Also think: I did Google Image him to get this pic and his name didn't even autofill as a potential search result until the second P in his last name.
Is he a That Guy?: No fucking way.

Zach Grenier

Immediately think: This guy has been in a bunch of shit. Vintage that guy material. And the only role I can think of off the top of my head is the pot smoking producer in Entourage.
Also think: Speaking of Entourage, girls probably see his name in the opening credits of shows sometimes and smile because they think they're gonna see Adrian Grenier, aka Vince.
Is he a That Guy?: No question. Almost offsets the whole William Morgan Sheppard debacle.

Craig Fairbrass

Immediately think: This guy looks familiar.
Also think: But not familiar enough. Maybe he'll be in Strike Back season 3??
Is he a That Guy?: No. He's a "who?".

JC Mackenzie

Immediately think: Hey, it's Dexter's neighbor who wanted to fuck Rita and Dexter scared the fuck out of him in his garage.
Also think: Lot's of commercials too.
Is he a That Guy?: This is the one that separates the Strict That Guy constructionists from the Loose That Guy constructionists. I'm a strict one.

Matt Malloy

Immediately think: Is that the high-talking husband who thought his wife was cheating on him in Seinfeld?
Also think: It's not, but this guy does have one of those faces that I feel like I see everywhere.
Is he a That Guy?: Borderline. But I won't look at you funny if you think he is one.

Paul Guilfoyle

Immediately think: It's Captain Brass from CSI.
Also think: Was in Cadillac Man.
Is he a That Guy?: I think he might have started off as a recurring character but this guy has been a series regular for the greater majority of the run of one of the most successful shows in TV history; almost 300 episodes. He's not a that guy. He's Captain Jim Fucking Brass from CSI.

Robert Joy

Immediately think: Seth Myers afflicted with progeria.
Also think: Do I not watch nearly as much TV as I think I do?
Is he a That Guy?: No. Seriously, who the fuck is this guy?

Gregory Itzin

Immediately think: It's President Charles Logan from "24", and shame on you if it's not what you think.
Also think: Never forget, never forgive. RIP David Palmer.
Is he a That Guy?: Fuck no. Once you become forever and universally identified with one character like Greg is with Pres. Logan, your that guy card gets shredded. No two ways about it.

Wade Williams

Immediately think: The asshole prison guard from Prison Break.
Also think: He's been in some other stuff too but nothing as memorable as the scene in Prison Break when he dipped his french fries in his milk shake. That, coupled with the way he slurped his shake still make me sick to my stomach to think about.
Is he a That Guy?: Doesn't feel like one to me. I'm getting tired of coming up with different ways to say why not.

Zeljko Ivanek

Immediately think: Damages, "24", The Event, Trueblood and a thousand other things.
Also think: Impossible that he doesn't speak in an Eastern Euro accent in real life.
Is he a That Guy?: Yes! He's a that guy hall of famer. He's been in a bunch of shit. He usually plays an impactful character, no matter how featured he is in the episode or series. He's all over the place.


Now here are just a few true that guys who either turned down the producers offer to be in the documentary or never occurred to them at all:

William Fichtner

Immediately think: The man who asked permission to shake the hand of the daughter of the bravest man he's ever met.
Also think: Prison Break, Drowning Mona (hilarious fucking movie), Invasion (great TV show that the rest of the world was too stupid to appreciate)
Is he a That Guy?: Textbook.

Richard Gant

Immediately think: Ossie Davis looks great.
Also think: Honestly, I've seen this guy in a bunch of stuff and always assumed he was Ossie Davis. Finally the other day I watched some quirky comedy where Rachel Bilson fell in love with some kid even though he'd been stalking her since childhood, anyway this guy was in it and I thought "How the fuck does Ossie Davis look so good? Grumpy Old Men was like 20 years ago, he has to be 90 by now". So I looked it up and Ossie is long dead and this guy's name is Richard Gant.
Is he a That Guy?: Ya, he's been one the whole time.

Michael Gaston

Immediately think: Jesus Christ, this fucking guy again!
Also think: Prison Break, Fringe, Jericho, Mad Men, The Mentalist, Last Resort...you can't even call yourself a prime time drama these days until Michael Gaston shows up. I almost shit when I first saw Inception assuming I was in a Gaston-free zone only to see him snag 10 seconds of screen time as the customs officer who says "Welcome Home" to Leo at the end. The fact that this guy never guest starred on LOST blows my mind. He is literally in everything.
Is he a That Guy?: He will probably go down in history as the gold standard of that guys. When I went to Google image him earlier I typed his name in as Quinn Gray. When that only returned results of a kidnapped rich woman, I had to look up his real name by IMDB'ing Jericho. And as it turns out his name on Prison Break was Quinn and his name on Jericho was Gray. That guy at it's finest. Role after role just running into each other in your head.

Nantasket's # 1! Nantasket's #1!

Boston.com - With the summer beach season under way, an environmental advocacy group is releasing a first-ever list of the Boston-area’s cleanest beaches, putting Nantasket beach in Hull on top and King’s beach in Lynn at the bottom.

The report by Save the Harbor/Save the Bay — relying on 2011 swimming season data from the Massachusetts Water Resources Authority, Department of Conservation and Recreation, U.S. Environment Protection Agency — outlines the water quality conditions of 18 Boston-area DCR-run beach locations.

Well congratulations to Nantasket Beach but isn't ranking Boston area beaches a little like walking into a Wal-Mart and picking out the best looking person? It doesn't matter how clean it is inside when it's covered with rocks and fat people. I understand the convenience of the local beaches and girls like to lay out and guys like to look at them, but that's not enough to make me spend a day at any beach around here. For my money I'll wake up early, pack up the car and head over the bridge. Plus, my blood is way too warm for that frigid water at Nantasket, every time I step in I feel like my shins are gonna freeze up and break off of my leg.  Cape or bust.

Nothing to See Here

Deadspin - A reader, whom we'll call Rob, emailed us Monday night with the photo you see above. The photo came with this message:

Looks like Terry francona is not too smart. Sending this picture to my 27 year old girlfriend isn't a smart move. Big job like his, he seems to trust a lot of people. Not sure how this picture would turn any girl on but good luck to him and his 53 year body.


Rob knew that his girlfriend, who lives in Tuscon, Ariz., had recently met Francona, a former University of Arizona ballplayer. After he sent us the towel photo, Rob wrote back to say he discovered that she had also exchanged a number of text messages with Francona: "I just saw phone records of them going back and forth. No content."

Rob wrote that he had "no idea" what this was adding up to. "Lots of texts and that pic. Can only mean he's trying to get with her."

He sent us an open letter to Terry Francona, which read as follows:

Hey Terry,


I was wondering why you would be flirting with my girlfriend, who is over 20 years younger than you, by sending pictures of yourself half-naked in a towel? Isn't one of your own children the same age as my girlfriend?


Next time you decide to do this, make sure the girl doesnt have a boyfriend. You would think that you would be more careful since you work for ESPN. I hope more girls come out saying you sent them the same stuff. You could be the next Tiger Woods. Scumbag.


As of Tuesday evening, we were all set to publish a post this morning about Francona emailing photos of himself half-naked in a towel to somebody's girlfriend. But then Rob sent us another email, and our heart ached for him a little.

So it looks like i found a picture she sent him first at 607pm on the 25th which is why he sent her a pic.

After reading all that I guess my first question is, "How does a 13 year old kid get a girl with tits like that?" Because there's just no other way to explain being as stupid and naive as "Rob" here unless you're 13. Does he think he's getting the best of Tito by sending this stuff to Deadspin? Does he know that the joke couldn't be more on him? Tito did absolutely nothing wrong. A 27 year old girl (which Francona probably considers old) sends him a shitty cropped cleavage pic and he shoots her back a "look at me living it up in Miami" or wherever the hell he is pic. Half-naked? I guess technically he is, but what's your point, Rob? He'd be showing more skin if he was just in his bathing suit. 


I was wondering why you would be flirting with my girlfriend, who is over 20 years younger than you, by sending pictures of yourself half-naked in a towel?


Is that a rhetorical question? Rob, you're such a whiny shithead. Your gf fucked Tito Francona and judging by your personality she's fucked some regular guys too. Either you guys have been together since High School and she doesn't have the balls to dump you or you've been dating for like a month and she doesn't know why you're calling her your girlfriend. Either way, you lose.


Tiger Woods? You dickhead. The ESPN guys were probably laughing when they read this story. It's a far cry from the Steve Phillips and Harold Reynolds stuff. Some delusional crybaby leaking a story about his girlfriend fucking a successful older guy who's estranged from his wife. On a scale of 1 to 10 the creepiness/inappropriateness factor is a zero. Seriously, Rob. Grow up.